The Pressure NOT to Get Married

By: Arwa Gaballa

To fit into the image of a successful and independent career woman, some of us are now being judged for wanting to have a family.

I'm sorry! Right! What the hell was I thinking? Of course as a "well-educated" and "open-minded" woman I must shave my head, repel men and make love to my independency instead.

(I'm not talking here about our families, because what parents won't sell their left eye for grandchildren?)

I'm talking about the judging smirks and rolling of eyes of the type of women who share awareness posts on Facebook all day as they listen to Christina Aguilera's "Can't Hold Us Down" and hate on the opposite sex — the overly cynical, sarcastic and angry independent things that we have all become. Yay!

Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't know me wanting to have children was reflecting poorly on our virtual community of tough women-for-equality! Because how could I possibly care about women rights, then say something as OUTRAGEOUS as "'I want to get married and have a baby".

"But, but, what are you going to do about your journalism dreams?"

Jeez, I don't know! Unless my partner will have me sign a prenup promising to become a vegetable as soon as we say "I do", I suppose I can continue to write?

Somehow, in our world of overachieving, realistic, busy, and very very angry, working women, it has become taboo to admit that we would like to get married one day — because "intelligent", "independent" and "ambitious" women are OBVIOUSLY not thinking like that, are they?

When did success and wanting a family become contradicting ideas? Why can't a woman want both?

(This is not a rhetorical question. I really would like to hear your views on this.)